There's a First for Everything

As I put together my classrooms and things started falling into place, I realized that all of my "firsts" were slowly being checked of the list. The big one that I was looking forward to was my first day as a real high school teacher. I had played so many different scenarios in my head about what the first day would be like and had practiced what brilliant things I would say to my students that would change their lives. Let's just say the things that happened in my head, didn't exactly happen in the classroom.

It was 6:50 am and I was standing in the commons waiting for my first group of students to show up. I had dreamed that we would have this amazing first day that none of them would ever forget! Half of them showed up about 20 minutes late, a quarter of them didn't even show up and the ones who were there, weren't there mentally. I was excited and nervous and they were just plain tired. I guess after being told over and over again that you can't succeed and that you're wasting your time, your view of school is pretty shot. These are my kids. I have two types of students. The "Blue" students and the "Gold" students. One group is there because they have fallen behind and the other group is there because they've been expelled. Both groups have been left behind and forgotten by the teachers who want to teach the kids who are "worthy" of their time and effort. I knew I had to change my approach. These students needed someone they could trust and someone who was willing to be there for them. They needed the assurance that I wasn't going to give up on them.

So, I changed my pace. I started talking about achieving greatness and being the best we can be. I talked about having people turn their backs in the most desperate time of need. I promised them that I would never be that person. I gave them journals and I told them that I would accept nothing less than their best. I told them that I would give them the tools they needed to succeed, but ultimately it is up to them whether or not they choose to use those tools properly. I showed them that I am not perfect and I showed them that I would always respect each of them as individuals. I stopped putting on a show and started being real. I spoke from my heart instead of from a piece of paper I had written the night before. Then and only then, did they respond. The kids that everyone had labeled as the "bad" kids were some of the kindest, most interactive kids I'd ever seen. These kids have been misunderstood their entire lives and it was time that they finally get what they truly deserve: someone who cares and is willing to stay up for hours trying to find things that will help them succeed and feel like the great kids I see in them every day.

"When one door closes, God opens a window"

Welcome to my blog! I have decided to document my first year of teaching by posting daily to this blog. I want to be able to look back on this year and remember when it all started. This is a place for me to express my struggles, successes, fears, failures, trials, hurdles, tribulations, "ah- hah!" moments and many other things. I hope those of you who are reading will enjoy my stories of my first year as a high school English teacher.

It was a Sunday evening in August around 7:30 pm when my mom and I were discussing my future. It had been a long summer of exhausting interviews from one end of Illinois to the other. I had decided I would move home and sub for a year and try the job market again. When my phone rang and I didn't recognize the number, I thought I'd ignore it. Who would be calling me on a Sunday night from a number I didn't know? As I stared at the number, I felt something strange. I needed to answer this call. When I picked up the phone, a woman on the other end was calling to ask if I'd be interested in an interview. I knew she must have been desperate, because it's not every day that a principal calls on a Sunday night to schedule interviews. I agreed to the interview and felt one last piece of hope in the pit of my stomach. At this point I had applied to over 85 jobs and had interviewed at around 25 of them. I had to look up where I would be interviewing because I had no idea what the woman was talking about. As I googled Woodruff Career and Technical Center in Peoria, I got a result that I was not expecting; WCTC would be the new alternative program for all of Peoria. I had never been so excited about an interview as I was for this one.

I pulled into the parking lot of WCTC around 40 minutes before my interview. Those of you who know my mother, I get my early arrival gene from my dad ;). As I sat in the parking lot staring at this huge school before me, I found myself talking to my dad. As most of you know, he passed away 10 years ago and is one of my biggest inspirations. Something happened in that car that night. I was no longer a recent college graduate who was desperate for a job and terrified of what was lying ahead; I was a woman who was passionate about teaching those in need and I was going to make myself known. As I sat in front of Mrs. Duke, I awaited the question that I had been asked so many times before: "So, why teaching?" The words that came out of my mouth were so true and so raw and for the first time, I knew I had nailed it.

I got the call that I had been hired at 9:30am the next morning. The next two weeks would be the busiest, craziest 2 weeks of my entire life. I found an apartment, I had training from 8-1 every day, I moved furniture, I prepared 3 classrooms and got to know the most amazing co-workers ever. My life had finally begun and school hadn't even started yet.